Fucked if I know, folks.
Not the answer you're looking for, I know, but it's the truth.
I could go over all the fucked up stuff that's happened since my last post, but there's little point. Plenty of people have already done that and continue to do so. If you're looking for a short list of sources that did go all-in on the jagoffs-in-chief, here are the ones that parts of me are monitoring (with RSS feed links):
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As I write this, I'm sitting in a coffee shop about halfway through January of 2025 trying desperately not to to wonder about what in the actual fuck is going on in the world right now for the sake of my mental health. It feels uncomfortably like when your glasses are just a little out of kilter and your vision is messed up in subtle, deeply annoying ways that you can't quite put your finger on. Warren Ellis recently put it thus: "I am once again Not Fully Awake, though possibly that is down to being repeatedly bludgeoned by the …
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Not even on fumes, mind you. Entirely unpowered and moving by momentum alone.
I'd say that 2024 has been a hell of a year, but I don't have to tell you that. If you've been paying attention at all to everything going on chances are you're feeling a mixture of dread, resignation, frustration, and most of all weariness. Bone-deep tiredness, and you can feel each and every one of your cells marinating in it. Or possibly frying like a whole turkey in peanut oil. But trauma dumping is Not A Thing We Are Allowed To Do, so I'm going to …
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It's been another one of those months, where just enough is going on that it's hard to keep track of what, actually, is going on, but not so much that it's impossible to put together and write about. Yet, weirdly it's ideal for lots of shower thoughts that, individually, don't add up to a whole lot. It's the exact opposite of a sweet spot for somebody with ADD. So I'm more or less forcing myself to sit down and write this to keep values in those registers. It's undoubtedly going to suck but I figure I have enough editing time …
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I haven't been tinkering a lot lately. Not because I haven't wanted to (well, that's not quite true) but because I've had other stuff that I wanted to get out of the way. Basically, I couldn't stand the impacted shitpile that I call an office-cum-workshop in its current state anymore. Figuring out how much floor space I had a few weeks ago really got to me and I decided to do something about it. I've been spending a couple of hours every day (after work and over the weekends) going through one thing at a time (one stack of drawers …
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Somehow it's turned into one of those really busy months, where I've been working on stuff more than anything else. Thing is, most of it isn't really worth talking about; not yet, anyway. Lifestyle maintenance is like that. It's not glamorous, interesting, or even all that fun, but it still has to get done, if only for the sake of one's mental health.
For starters, I've been trying to free up some room in my office (where I spend most of my days, if only because of my day job). Talking to someone a week or two ago about home …
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It's July 4th as I sit outside and write this post, after quite a few years of wondering if I should type this up. But, I figured, I'm not getting any younger and if I ever get around to writing my memoirs I'm going to put this in there, anyway, and there's no guarantee that I'll remember this if and when I ever do. So, here goes.
Content warning: Gore. This is kind of the definition of trauma for a little kid so if you don't want to read about fireworks accidents you might want to close the tab and …
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For starters, let me just say that there is nothing wrong with me as I write this. I used the tag "cancer" up there because this post talks about cancer screening. Also, as I finish and polish this post up a few days later I found out that nothing unusual was found, "You're good, see you in ten years."
Second, I'll try my best to not be gratuitous given the subject matter. Believe me, the prospect of writing about the far end of my gastrointestinal tract does not thrill me. I'll try to give the topic the gravitas it deserves …
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I'm still around and kicking, just taking it easy (or as easy as feasible right now). As I write this, we're well into March and I'm trying to be gentle with myself - not forcing writing if I can't string words together (which is annoying when ideas come in the shower), not really looking for anything specific to do, just letting things unfold for a while. I don't have any big projects lined up, nor am I looking for any (I do, actually, but it's going to be one of those "pick at it off and on for a while" kind …
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I find myself asking that question a lot these days.
Another question I've been asking myself a lot is, what the hell am I going to write in this post? I've tried a few things in the days leading up to this (timed) post, and to be honest they all, upon rereading, sound like I'm some combination of coming apart at the seams, in dire need of a vacation in which I do not get sick, in need of therapy (which, to be fair, I am), and sleeping like I did in high school (which is to say, not sleeping …
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