Where have I been lately?

Mar 03, 2015
Tags: life, meta

That's an interesting question.

The short answer is, I've been busy. Very much so.

The longer and more accurate answer is that work has been running me ragged lately and I've been trying to conserve my spoons as best I can, lest I run myself into the ground (again). I've been routinely putting in 60 and 70 hour weeks, often over six or seven days so I haven't really been getting a whole lot of downtime. So some hard choices had to be made. Go out for my birthday or keep it low key? Low key, because I'm on call. Get a couple of blog posts written and post dated? Oops, on my one day off I slept sixteen hours. Wouldn't have done so if my body hadn't needed it so I'm not going to cry about it. Come home from work and do some writing? Came home from work at 2200 local time, had something that I think was dinner, and faceplanted. Get up early and socialize, or get up early and shake a few bugs out of one of my bots (the output of which happens to be keeping me sane (more or less))? Nobody else is up that early, so code a little bit and then back to the grind, by way of the gates of horn and ivory.

For those of you who've been worried (and this goes for your bots, too), I'm not dead though I have been dead to the world not a few times in the past two months.

When you get right down to it self-care is what keeps most of us held together. Sometimes, the wise thing to do is to recharge as best one can to keep going. Often that involves kicking everything else off and sleeping for a day or two. Or skipping some fun things because the toll exacted on one's body and spirit is too much, and cratering as a result can make things worse.

If it's one thing I've learned, it's that sometimes it's the right thing to do. Life is full of interesting and fun things to do and see, and getting benched for a while, even though it can feel frustrating or irritating doesn't particularly diminish life as a whole. Certainly not if you don't let it. There is lots more out there, and when things calm down (and they will - it doesn't feel like it right now but I think they will) it'll be time to go for them again.

Just don't forget what it felt like to have those good times. They'll be what remind you to go back to them.